Friendship

You know, I never wished I was single again. Because even with all the hard stuff I've gone through, I still like it here where I am. Sometimes I heard people (who are in a r/ship) said that they wishes to be single again...and a friend and I came to a conclusion : These people are feeling not right/depressed in their r/ship to be saying things like that. If you are okay and you feel that your r/ship is working out regardless of the ups and downs, you won't feel like that.

I am not saying this because I have a great r/ship and that it's perfect. Because it's not. Nothing is perfect actually. I have my ups and downs...sometimes over some stupid things. But I have faith in this, I have faith in myself and I have faith in him. Relationship requires a lot of patience, tolerance, gives & takes, understanding, trust, honesty and I guess most of the stuff that you too can think of.

I am not what you say a girl that guys want to be with. Guys will treat me as one of them (of course, not exactly like they treat a guy!). My greatest friends are 99% guys and no, I don't feel any attraction to any of them. So, I respect my bf for trying to understand me (simply because I'm not the easiest person to be understood). I know that it's hard for him to take me as I am and to learn my ways...it's also hard for me to change from who I am before...but we're doing it both. Understanding each other's needs -- him giving me a little freedom to go out with them (because they are my friends since I was so little - "This is Friendship," Arif said.) and I have to create boundaries and limits in going out with them.

Some of the guys that I used to hang out with are not to pleased with the way I am not in the case that I seldom hang out with them anymore (haha...they missed me!). They said some not so great things...but this is actually my choice. I choose to do what I am doing now...I don't want to hang out until late 12 midnight etc and they have to understand that. So far, Arif, Naf, Aji and Crip understands it (figures...since I've been with these guys since primary school). The rest -- some just kept quiet and some, well, as I was telling you before...hmmm... My action? I don't care. If I think what I'm doing now is good, I'll just continue with it.

That's what I really feel now. Just need to get this off my chest. Some of the guys like Arif, Crip, Naf and Aji...I don't mind hanging out with. They're always there for me, don't mind me being just plain Ili...the friend they knew since little, supporting me with good changes, lets me speak my mind out and giving me a piece of their mind after and so much more. Like what Arif said, "Ni lah Friendship!" (which reminds me also of what Ikan once said to me).

Until then, I'll sign off here. Be back with another episode with another title. ;) Hehehehheh. ChOwWWwZZzzaaaAa!!!!