Whatever words I say, I will always love you...

Yesterday, me and my bf had a quite 'tense discussion'. It's not an argument because we were not fighting. He had this bad instinct, and took a sudden decision to come and see me. Well, he was right.

A friend of mine (from UTM) called and asked me out. Me and two of them (guys). I was not confirmed on whether I want to go or not. I know I didn't really want to go because in my mind was, This is not right. I cannot do this. He would not like it. It was also the fact that I somehow know he won't like me going out with them (well, one of them actually). Then, as I was writing an sms cancelling my going out with them, my bf called. With a very tense tone, he said he's coming to see me. I knew something was not right.

So, when he came to the house, we had very tense moments. He said some things that hurted me. There were so many times that I just wanted to cry...but I held it back. Although I kinda knew he didn't meant any of it, the words were hurtful. I remember myself standing there with him and felt one of the worse feeling I have ever felt - if he walked out of my life (okk..I feel like I want to cry now).

However far away,
I will always love you;
However long I stay,
I will always love you;
Whatever words I say,
I will always love you,
I will always love you.

Anyway, I'm glad it was only a short while. He just needed to make sure that I would never do anything that he didn't like and anything that would hurt him. We're okk after our discussion and went out together as usual. This time, our love is stronger. I know that now. I am so in love with him...no matter how long we're together.

You know, it's great that we had our magic with each other. All these instincts both of us get when things were not quite right. It proves that we have our deep connection with one another. It tells me that he is an important part of me. That I can never be without him. That he is the man in my life. I love you sygg...